christakatarina

I seriously can't cope with this stress anymore. I haven't really had time to write on here for a while, but let's just say that nothing has changed. We're having so many problems with the new flat, and if they aren't sorted by Friday we just can't move in. Then it goes to somebody else. It's really hard to be young, or at least a student, in London. The prices are stupidly high, and you only get to rent if you've got rich parents or a lot of money saved. We'll see how this goes. Once again they have given us a move in date, but who knows what's gonna come up now.

 

I'm doing worse in uni of course. I'm having stomach pains and headaches all the time, and can't really focus on uni work. The exams are coming up in two weeks and while everybody else is doing really good on the mock exams, I can't even write enough words. I'm starting to believe in Maslow's hierarchy of needs, when you don't feel good physically nothing else works either.

 

School has always been pretty easy for me, I was never an A kid, but I passed everything. Now I'm sure that I'm gonna fail accounting, and it doesn't matter how many videos I watch, how much I read or try to understand, numbers just isn't my thing. And I need to pass to get to year 2 and 3. I need to.

 

Sorry for complaining all the time. It's time for a new me soon, when I'm ready.

I'm so thankful for the dance classes I go to. It's a few hours every week when I can just forget all the stress.

 

Finally we're closer to a moving date. We got a call yesterday and now we just need Ellis mum to sign and send a guarantor form, and then they're gonna do a check up on all three of us. If that goes okay we should be able to move at the end of this week. We hope Friday!

 

I'm having big problems with CSN and my loan. Our course time has changed and from the start we were supposed to have a break between week 10-20, which means I'm not getting any CSN during that time. However, now that it's changed I'll be in uni those weeks as well, but they still won't give me any loan. After paying all the fees and deposit and first rent on this new place I'll be in trouble. Please please CSN, work with me!

 

The job that I went to have a trial at won't pay me enough, so I'm trying to negotiate with them as well. I only have a few days a week I can work because of studies which means I need to have a job with a 'ok' amount of pay. We'll see... If they don't agree to pay me more I just have to try to look for something else.

 

I'm also pretty sure that I'll fail the accounting exam.

 

Life is so stressful right now.

Monday morning and we still haven't heard anything. The good thing is that when they last phoned us it was around lunchtime, so they might not even be open until 11 am or something. If they don't phone us, we will have to contact them and say that we need the contract signed, otherwise we'll have to get our deposit back and find something else. And they probably don't want to give it back, so they have to fix it.

 

The weekend went fast.and I really enjoyed my belly dance class yesterday. Last week I wasn't feeling good and my whole body was swollen, and I was mad at myself for not doing better. This week was the opposite, everything just made sense and worked out well. I'm gonna miss two classes: one because I'm in Sweden, and the other one when we're in Estonia for Simple Session. The night Before our show I'm in Birmingham to see Drake, but we might go home early the day after so I can do the show. I started to look at costumes on the belly dance school's website. I really wonder what we're gonna wear... Hopefully something red or pink, those colours make me look not as pale as I am haha.

 

Apparently we are going to get the house, but the guy who has moved out from there still needs to sign some papers before the landlord can give it to us. I really want to think that we are getting it, but since things didn't work out last time I don't want to get too excited. The guy who was supposed to move in here this weekend was okay with moving in next week instead, so now we really have to leave soon. I really hope they phone us on Monday and that we can move in that week.

 

On Monday I am going to Beckenham to teach a Zumba class. I applied for a job there and they invited me to a trial. I hope everything goes well, because it looks like I will be teaching two classes a week if I get the job. That would mean that I have a total of three classes every week, which is good Money. And money is exactly what I need since we're moving to a lot more expensive place than this.

 

This weekend I'm just studying. I have so much uni work to do. Assignments to hand in, a portfolio to complete and mock exams to study for. Luckily I have a bellydance class tomorrow, it's gonna be nice doing something else and just not think for a while.

 

Seriously... The agency called us last night and said that the couple that are living in our new place are having problems with the apartment they were going to buy. Which means that they can't move out. That means we can't move there no more. We were both so excited... and we have to be out in 9 days. We went to look for a house last night with the same agency. It was a little too expensive for us so we put a lower offer, so we'll see how that goes... At least they will try to negotiate since we didn't get our first place. I'm so stressed... We'll be homeless soon.

Ten days until we're moving and I'm starting to get really excited. So excited that I started to pack today... It's only two suitcases so far, and most for the reason that we have so much stuff and our room is so small.

 

Yesterday Ellis and I went for a nice walk by the river, and then I Went to a dancehall class with Ruth, a girl from my class. We both really enjoyed it and talked about going next week again.

 

Today when I woke up I had the worst headache ever, but decided to go to uni anyway hoping that it would get better later. On my way there I felt my head get more and more heavy, and in class I could barely keep my Eyes open. I left after 30 min. Apparently there's a lot of people who are getting sick now in our class, we just have to hope it won't stay long.

 

 

While mum is sending me pictures of a white and cold Sweden, the weather is starting to be really nice here in London. It's still cold, but it has been sunny for days now. I went to my second belly dance class yesterday which was fun, but I have become so bad! Really need to do some practice at home...

 

12 days until we're moving. A few weeks until I go back to Sweden. I decided to go there the week before exam week. It's probably better like that, otherwise I'll just find excuses not to study if Ellis is around :)

 

We have been in London for a week now and I have already had plenty of sleepless nights. Sharing apartment really isn't my thing. I felt so fresh and full of energy when I left Sweden, and I kind of looked forward to school. Now I'm just tired, stressed and zombieish. However, I have had a lot to do. Like I mentioned before, E and I found somebody to take over our contract, which meant we could move out! So when we first came here, we started phoning places and view flats. We started off with some really bad ones, or maybe I should say: apartments that just weren't right for us. Too small, too far away, too bad areas and so on. But then, last Thursday when I was teaching Zumba, I got a text that he viewed a place and signed the contract! I haven't seen it at all, but the pictures tell that it's really nice.

 

We were supposed to move out 19th, that's when the new guy was gonna move in, but the people living in our new place couldn't move out until 25th, so we had to negotiate with our guy. Everything worked out fine, and now it's only 13 days until we move! The funny thing is that the house is right next to our, so we won't need a van or anything, we can just walk over there with our stuff. I can't describe how excited I am, I just want to move now. The best part after quiet and sleepy nights, is that we're gonna have a clean kitchen! We both really enjoy cooking, but in our current place it's just so dirty all the time that you don't really want to deal with food in the kitchen.

 

I'm working on my last assignments for this term (we've got half term in February) and then I need to start studying for the exams. I was kind of looking forward to the exams until I found out the questions are long and in essay style. If I'm supposed to write a 400 word essay I wouldn't really call it an exam... I want those short "a few word questions", but I guess I anything won't change only cause I complain, haha. I hope and think that I will pass the exams though. Only problem will be accounting.. I don't really have a plan of how to deal with that yet.

 

I just realised how boring my blog must be. I update once a week, and when I do, I only write about what I'm doing in school. Hmm, I was thinking about starting a blog in Swedish and taking it more seriously, we'll see...

 

I can't believe how fast time goes. Two weeks ago I just teached my last Zumba class of the year, and was excited about going back to Sweden the day after. The first week here I was spending a lot of time at home with my old friends. We haven't really done anything special, but I've been so happy and full of energy around them. It's like we never even were apart, like we've always lived closed to each other, like we've seen each other every day... I really have the best friends.

 

Christmas was nice. We just stayed home and had a very cosy and lazy christmas. I never liked traditional Christmas food, and it hasn't changed since I moved to London either haha... But both Christmas eve and day we're great. And I got so many nice presents! Ellis got me my favourite perfume from Victoria's Secret, and tickets to Drake in Birmingham in March. And I finally got to tell him what he got, something that has been so hard to keep as a secret. We're going to Simple Session, a BMX competition in Estonia at the end of February.

 

Ellis came to Sweden on the 28th, and we spent New Years Eve with my mum and her friend on a cruise. The last days I've been doing a lot of uni work, and now I'm just trying to prepare for school again. I really could had a few weeks longer break, but there's nothing I can do about it. I can't Believe our next break is in April... Four months...

 

I signed up for a belly dance course starting on Sunday, the day after we go back to London. We're also moving... like I wrote earlier we needed to find somebody to take over our contract, and we finally found him the day before I went home! So we have no more than two weeks to find a new place....